MIKE: What's on the big screen tonight?
MAX: Oh, just a film about some people who go to Poland. They find a shrine. Well not a shrine actually...a statue
MIKE: There is a big difference between the two, because a shrine is where you go worship, and a statue is just...a statue. What's the movie called?
MAX: The Shrine.
MIKE: Da fuck?
MIKE: The Shrine is a film that follows a young ambitious journalist, Carmen (Cindy Sampson)—hell-bent on finding the one story that will catapult her career—hot on the trail of a young man who has gone missing while back packing across Eastern Europe. Carmen convinces her boyfriend Marcus (Aaron Ashmore) and her plucky intern Sara (Meghan Heffern) to follow her to a small town in Poland, where she hopes to uncover the mystery as to why this boy and others (a small handful of people, mind you) have disappeared over the last 50 years.
MAX: Well, that is a very general synopsis of the movie, which is in itself, very general, at least in the first thirty minutes. This story begins in a non-descript urban locale, with the three fairly non-descript characters you described. Carmen, the cold career driven journalist, works at some magazine or newspaper, where she has an obedient intern who seems to do everything she says. I definitely found it hard to believe that the intern girl Sara would be willing to follow cold career bitch Carmen all the way to Poland on her own dime, but since this is a movie, I guess it's easier just to accept that ridiculous premise. Of course Carmen doesn't want to go without having someone along to snap photos of her ground-breaking story, so she manipulates her grumpy boyfriend Marcus (incidentally a photographer as luck would have it) into coming along as well. Marcus is grumpy because Carmen only thinks about her career, so the solution that she proposes is for them to have a romantic trip together in Poland. Seriously? A romantic trip to Poland? Oh, and I nearly forgot, Carmen and the intern don't tell anyone from the magazine staff where they’re going, because then the magazine staff would know where to look for them once they’re dead. All of this set up is extremely dull and trite, and probably enough to sour you on the film, if you don't stick around to see what happens in the Polish village.
MIKE: The Polish village is where things slowly become more interesting. I say slowly, because you really have no fucking clue what's going on there. They speak very little English, and though that does add to the suspense, I really wasn’t sold on the dread until the three Americans ventured forth towards the woods where the missing boy's journal ultimately leads them. That's another thing. Prior to them leaving, Carmen goes and visits the missing boy's mother, and while she is thumbing through his journal she sees his ghost who tells her NOT to follow him. I'm not sure about you, but a grotesque ghost with a deformed bloody face is going to turn me off on an adventure to Poland.
MIKE: I mean, what the hell is up with that? She never even mentions it to her boyfriend or her intern. It doesn't make any sense. Is she THAT stupid?
MAX: ................yeah. That didn't make any sense. Suffice it to say that the first third of this movie is basically throw-away. Anyway, once the three Americans arrive in the village, I think the film picks up its pace. There is a very xenophobic paranoia about these backwoods Eastern Europeans, with their strange pagan looking church and their stern frowning people. The cloud of fog that hovers over the forest is also creepy, and leads the film into the direction of the supernatural realm. The statue inside the fog is particularly horrific. While it's easy to understand why one would want to stare at it, this is clearly not a wise idea.
MIKE: Anyway, I feel like there are much better movies out there that deal with stories about strange things in dense fog, like The Fog. I enjoy the concept very much, but what I don't enjoy are the stupid characters that go in ONE AT A TIME into this thick fog just to move the story along. I mean, why is it when you see something supernatural most characters in a horror film go off on their own? Is it really that hard for the monster/psycho to kill them off in a bunch? I will say that the statue looked cool, and I loved the thumping bleeding heart in its hand.
MAX: I did find it implausible how the girls basically wandered off one by one into the mist. Although I think at this point in the movie I was more curious than annoyed. Then once the Americans are captured and dragged into the dungeon, we know they've really messed up. The people in the village definitely didn’t want them to look upon their sacred shrine, but why is that? The ritual sacrifice we see them perform on Sara, involving the mask is gory and grotesque. It reminded me of that scene Barbara Steele from Mario Bava's Black Sunday, but updated for a contemporary audience. It's kind of funny how Carmen is looking on from her cell during that moment and trying to comfort the girl by saying, "I'm right here, Sara." I'm not sure that really makes any difference to a person who is getting nails driven into their eyes. Worst internship ever.
MIKE: I'm not sure if I would have found comfort in Carmen's words either, since the bitch is the one who got my plucky ass into this. New word of the day kiddies, "Plucky." I will admit that the dungeon scene played out really well, and what I seriously enjoyed about this movie was that the towns people spoke only in Polish during those intense moments, so, unless you speak-a-dee Polsky, you had no clue why any of this was happening. I think that was the only bit of brilliant writing/directing made in this film. For the most part, however you're left scratching your head and saying things to yourself like, "Da fuck?" or "Co to kurwa jest?”
MAX: That's an excellent point you make. The omission of subtitles was definitely crucial in establishing the film's outcome. Like you said, Carmen really was the person who, by virtue of her selfishness, dragged the others into the hellish mess in the first place. Therefore it makes sense that she is the one who ultimately morphs into a demon of the statue's making. I think her transformation in the mirror is very telling because it shows that maybe (in the metaphorical sense) this thing was living inside her all along.
MIKE: The transformation scene was pretty good, and I tip my hat to those special effects guys who made it happen. The scene takes place in a house, and instead of following Carmen around (you do a bit), you're really following Marcus as her transformation is taking place. I thought it was hilarious how Marcus ties up the family in the house—trying to stop them from harming his sweet Carmen—and then you hear them screaming bloody murder off camera, because they are now easy prey for the Demon possessed Carmen. Its like, "Oops. My bad. Didn't know my selfish bitch of a girlfriend was really a she-demon bitch from Hell."
MAX: I agree, Marcus is a real tool. It's ironic how much effort he goes through to make Carmen happy, when all she does is make trouble for him every step of the way. Not only did I not feel sorry for his girlfriend, but I found it difficult to have empathy for him as well. By the end of the movie when the villagers have successfully destroyed the demonic thing that Carmen has become, the xenophobic paranoia element is absent. Now we know that the Polish people of the village observe those customs for a reason. That it was really Marcus and his friends who were destructive. I thought it was rather civil of the villagers to let Marcus walk out of there with his skin intact. The village suffered quite a body count on behalf of his "my bad."
MIKE: Ha-ha-ha! Indeed. I guess this is where we give our final opinion of the film. The Shrine is another horror movie that does a really crappy job of character development, and I am sick and tired of the lame-ass excuse of, "Yeah, but it's a horror movie, and those people are just there to die." Really? This is a conceptual film--not a whole lot more than that--and for a concept like this to work really well then you need to have strong characters with real motivations. The movie would have been better if Carmen was going to Poland to trace some sort of family heritage thing. The Shrine fails to hook the audience in, gives us annoying characters that go willy-nilly along with anything just to keep the pencil-thin story moving, and ultimately I am left unsatisfied with the final product. I will give it the slightest bit of kudos for an entertaining ending, but by that point I didn't really care if any of them lived or died. I give this film two Bloody Nubs down.
MAX: I agree with you about the pencil thin characters and I would like to see some newer horror films in which the characters have actual relationships with one and other. I disagree that the film is a total failure though. While it may not be much of a character driven piece, I think there is somewhat of a character arc (albeit a poor one) presented in Carmen. There is a reason that it is she who turns into the creature as opposed to the two others. I also really enjoyed the special effects in this picture. I thought for that alone, it is a cut above others of its kind. For a one time instant view on Netflix, this ain’t too bad in my opinion. The movie certainly takes its time to get going, but once it gets there, I think it delivers a punch that both gore hounds and fans of demonic possession flicks will appreciate. We kind of had to mention the ending in this case because it's the main thing that makes the movie worth watching. I give The Shrine one bloody nub up for a fun twist ending and one down for the majority of the acting.
